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Isfj dating

He’s frighteningly accurate, even in areas he’s not totally familiar with.

My husband told me shortly after we met that he found me intimidating.I haven’t had this experience in a relationship per se, but I’ve certainly been called anti-social more than once.I avoid talking on the phone (or, God forbid, Face Time – the horror), shopping anywhere but online, and keeping more than a couple of friends, because all these require far more interaction than I’m interested in having.These similarities must come at a price, I suppose, and it is this: the deep well of INFJ emotion versus overriding INTJ rationality.It has always been fairly uncommon for us to argue; our shared intuition leads us to respect and encourage each other.The problem lies in the fact that the INFJ can ‘see’ past the things the INTJ can’t, most often with little proof.That will be an issue for the INTJ – if it can’t be seen or touched or proven, it may as well not exist.I think it was this that got my attention when I met my husband: he was self-assured, intelligent, wonderfully sarcastic, and aloof.I had never met someone so much like me, but with more confidence.He was in a previous relationship with someone who enjoyed socializing regularly, and he describes this as a source of constant struggle between them.He wanted to stay home most of the time, so she accused him of being boring.


  1. Dec 15, 2013 Update 6/7/2016 Since publishing this post, I’ve become increasingly unsatisfied with MBTI charts that try to find a character from a film or TV series.

  2. The following is an update on family roles from ACA Adult Children of Alcoholics. I call ACA Adult Children of Addicts because that covers most of us.

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